02:05 (AM)

[(As usual) I’m elaborating on what I said yesterday.]

To prevent more distortion in the story about me, I think a “public debate” (though I wanted to keep things simple and private, but that is not an option) would be good. To let both sides of the story about me be heard at one occasion, and let people then form their own opinions. Instead of just following those lies that were spread about me, when I was “missing”.

I would appreciate it a lot, if we could stir in my debate about Keynes and the practices of the alternative sustainable financial system I’d like to put into practice. Meow the encounter is such a good opportunity to share ideas xd.

It took a very long time – two years, instead of the two weeks I expected – but I couldn’t be happier with the way it’s playing out.

This one encounter is the reason why I started to share my story. So that people can get the chance to form their own opinions, instead of following my parents’ right away, when hell breaks loose again, once I’ll leave them for good, after I’m finally reunited with he who does understand me.

Ever since my parents forbade me to see dr. Crutzen, who can add sooooooo much depth to my business strategy, in a way no one else can, I was lost. I was very disappointed in them, for their interference.

All my life, they’ve been breathing down my neck for good grades and anything else that is important when you want to see your child successful and wealthy. So I was so shocked, when they started to prohibit my business from thriving.

The fights we were having because of this, caused me to never want to speak to them again. This want has never changed. (My financial situation keeps it from happening. I’m basically bankrupt x_x. I can’t move out…)

I felt very depressed after being forced to let go of the person who had become so important to me in a very short period of time. My parents went as far as forcing me to undergo psychiatric treatment for this. I’ve been forced to take many types of antipsychotics.

My (low-budget, because then, too, I was broke) way to escape the psychiatric treatment I could not escape from, was running from home. I’ve told them plenty of times that I did not want that treatment and that they should fucking listen to me. So I was shocked to hear that they reported me missing, when it was clear to me that if you do not accept the terms under which I wish to live in the household of which I, too, make part, those people can get the fuck out of my life.

Everyone who is capable of believing that I have ever not been able to find my way home, and who believes that I’m a schizophrenic, can stay the fuck out of my life. I’m everything except an individual who can not handle the mental. As a matter of fact, I’m one of the few who dares and is able to think of solutions to the fucking shit world we live in.

The reason why all of this pisses me off so fucking much, is because they had the nerve to ignore my wishes, let me be diagnosed with schizophrenia and live stigmatized, without ever asking dr. Crutzen for his side of the story. They believed that he was only my professor, but that I didn’t even attend his class and that I only believed that I had a connection with him, because I had been smoking too much weed.

The fact that he wants to help me end the hell I’ve been living through, already gives them an indication that they’ve been VERYYYYYYYY wrong for saying that I’ve never spoken to him in private. And my encounter with him will prove everything else I’ve been saying, too.

I really hope that, if my mother and dr. Crutzen really decide to make it big, my Vicje, Sander and Lorenzo will be present as well, and that they would like to become my ambassadors 😀 . And that every motherfucker involved in putting me through that psychiatric hell will be present, too, so that I can personally tell them that I’m going to sue them all for emotionally destroying me.

That was a very little summary of the shit I’ve been living through in the past two years. I hope the conclusion – which is the encounter – will come soon. I want to finally leave this all behind and focus on what is really important: D.O.C.I.S. International.

So meoww, today, I’m going to be hoping that my B calls my mother to arrange things, while I do my bookkeeping (both business and personal) [I’m going to make my Access database for it today…] and attend a boxing class.

I’m now going to attempt to sleep, while on the inside, as usual, I’m still raging because of the ignored injustice I’ve been living through all this time and people turning their backs on me et cetera.

Good night ♥


14:43 (02:43 PM)

Meoww my preference for our first encounter really is something private, though. A public debate is much nicer when it’s well-prepared (by both sides). And there are far too many emotions I’ve had to hide for two years, so I’d really like a moment to combine the sadness of my two years of hell (if not more), with the extreme happiness that will come from seeing him and all of this finally being over, in private.

I hope we’ll take some good pictures together. And that we’ll co-write many things!!!

Guess where I’m at? Still in bed x_x. My stomach as earsplitting as usual.

Meoww I feel so tired, still 🙁 . I should make an appointment to see my doctor in Germany, but the journey of visiting him is tiring as well (just thinking of it makes me feel as if I’ll collapse on the way there), and I’m crazy broke. I feel like bed petting all day again x_x. Aside from making my own bookkeeping database, of course.

I don’t know if I should go boxing today. I love getting rid of my cropped up anger, but doing that in a group, with the risk of entering a new/boosting a gossip scheme, whenever I do something odd, as the newcomer… I’ve been too alone for too long to be able to enjoy a non-business-related group setting, I feel.

Especially because I fuuucking hate mainstream media and don’t give a fuck about celebrity gossip et cetera, I don’t feel like meeting new people. I just want my Graeynissis…


18:09 (06:09 PM)

Heyy I have this random accounting question I’d like to ask a Graeyniss:

When I buy a WordPress plugin to improve my services, is that plugin than accounted for as an asset with monetary value?

Because in reality, digital products are worthless, but I do have paid for it…

I’m making a VBA application for my personal bookkeeping, because regular software is not programmed for my situation, where all business expenses are done from my personal account.


19:52 (07:52 PM)

The same question goes for the purchase of a license for a virus scanner… I’ll now account for it as “general operating expense”.