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- xxx -

Yay

Popular Posts

FangCatje - Nederlandse Versie (Preview)
Reflecting on what's ahead [Sunday, November 24, 2019]
Back Online :) [Thursday, June 13, 2019]
Twenty-three 🙀 [Friday, November 1, 2019]
Highlights [Monday, May 27, 2019]
A Hypothetical Organizational D.O.C.I.S. Draft
Voting & Writing [Wednesday, March 20, 2019]
CastleFangs 🏰 [Sunday, June 16, 2019]
Een verhaaltje
Crisis Center Day 6 [Sunday, June 2, 2019]
Passion 5 [Sunday, July 28, 2019]
Lil Tension [Wednesday, July 3, 2019]
Hmmm... Let's do Nothing :D [Thursday, July 18, 2019]
Passion [Wednesday, July 24, 2019]
Inner Crown [Tuesday, November 12, 2019]
Passion 3 [Friday, July 26, 2019]
The Perspective of the Crown [Thursday, November 14, 2019]
Reform Development Day 1 [Friday, June 14, 2019]
Operation Sunnyhoes Day 3 [Tuesday, August 27, 2019]
No Release Twice in a Row [Sunday, June 30, 2019]
Rudi Harold Hanenberg 81st Birthday [Monday, November 18, 2019]
The D.O.C.I.S. Store is open for Pre-Orders! :D
Afternoon Improv
December Manifest
Boxes [Wednesday, September 18, 2019]
Behind the Scenes [Tuesday, November 5, 2019]
This is not a Game.
A Reflection about Attraction [Thursday, November 28, 2019]
Still At It [Sunday, May 26, 2019]
Operation Sunnyhoes Day 4 [Wednesday, August 28, 2019]
Popular Posts, Strategy

The D.O.C.I.S. Book Club

Do you also have a lot of unshared thoughts? Are you in the mood for something new? Are you creative? Do you also wonder what the thought patterns of people with views similar or opposite to yours look like? Then the D.O.C.I.S. Book Club might be something for you. I hope that you have been thinking of becoming a member. This article explains what you can expect as a member of the D.O.C.I.S. Book Club and what The D.O.C.i.S. Book Club Alliance stands for. It is written with the utmost transparency, hoping that that will spark your excitement about becoming…

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MacroFangs, Strategy

The D.O.C.I.S. Book Club Alliance Agreement

Last updated: August 21, 2019 This Agreement is composed for you (“you” means “potential Book Club member” or “Book Club member”, depending on what suits the reader of this agreement best, and will also be named “Book Club member”, “member of D.O.C.I.S. International”, “member” because this is about Book Club memberships), to ensure that you are aware of what requirements D.O.C.I.S. International should meet for its Book Club members, as well as know what is expected from you as a D.O.C.I.S. Book Club member, when you become an official member of the D.O.C.I.S. Book Club. Article 1: Definitions 1.1. D.O.C.I.S….

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Online Diary

Sexy Dream

Heyyy ♥ Hehe according to my schedule, I should actually be working on some legal documents right now, but I reallyyy want to share what was on my mind last night, as I was trying to make my thoughts enter sleep mode. Sexy Pajama Party I had this fantasy of being at “a” festival, where everyone can just be themselves without having to behave politically correct and stuff. As I was walking from one stage to another, I spotted Catthierry. As usual, I was overwhelmed by “How should I behave?”-questions. But different from usual, I decided to be my touchy…

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Online Diary

Lil Status Update

Heyyy ♥ It seems like everything will be finished on time! I’m here with a lil status update. 🙂 Today I’ve been working on the online environment of our (assuming that you’ll sign up 😀 ♥ ) D.O.C.I.S. International Network. You’ll be able to access the Book Club Forum, vote for D.O.C.I.S. International related things, add and private message friends, form groups for any cause, and much more depending on what you choose when you sign up (write articles, suggest things, sign up for elections, etc.). 😀 You can sign up from August 23rd onward, though The D.O.C.I.S. Store officially…

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Strategy

The Privacy Statement has been updated!

My dear reader,

I have very important news to tell you: the Privacy Policy of D.O.C.I.S. International has been updated to a Privacy Statement.

The difference between a privacy policy and a privacy statement is that a policy consists of guidelines and a statement consists of a fixed “it is the way it is”. Though nothing has changed about the way D.O.C.I.S. International operates – aside from starting an awesome Book Club 😀 – this Privacy Statement is an initiative to be even more transparent.

You can read it by clicking here.

Online Diary, Strategy

Openness & Capacity

Heyyy ♥ The completion of the online D.O.C.I.S. International empire is getting closer and closer. 🙂 And so are my trip to Curaçao, the start of university in Antwerp and finding an apartment. It’s all yays. 🙂 Earlier today, I visited the south of the center of Antwerp to see another potential apartment. It is located in such a nice neighborhood! I snapped some quick pictures… But still they don’t display how pretty it was. 🙂 Usually, when I think of a city center, I think of an overdose of car traffic and cramped streets. This was meowww. 😻 I…

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Images, Nosce Te Ipsum, Online Diary, Popular Posts, Strategy

I really recommend you to read this post!!!

My Graeynisssssssss ♥ As a regular Dutch person would say, “I don’t want to fall with the door in house” (AHAHAHAHAHA) but I’m going to dive right into it! Looooook at this: The D.O.C.I.S. Store is getting a lot closer to being finished. 😀 What it looks like in practice? Amazing! 😀 I really hope you will sign up!!! ♥ Oh and meoww D.O.C.I.S. International has a new logo: I don’t know if you click on the links I share in my blog posts, so that’s why I’m showing screenshots… And I just took away the slider on the home…

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Online Diary

This Diary is Changing [Monday, August 12, 2019]

Heyyy ♥ ♥ ♥ How was your weekend? I hope you’ve made some fun memories. I’ve been working on the fun memories we’ll create as a future international book club. Omg meoow I really can’t wait until everything is done. (Though I’m a bit worried about if anyone who now frequently visits my blog will sign up…) It will be such fun! To have nerdy hangouts together… Once every quarter, I’ll rent a location where the D.O.C.I.S. Book Club (also known as the D.O.C.I.S. International Council) will meet up. It’s very easy to combine with your current occupation, regardless of…

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Audio, Images, Online Diary, Popular Posts

First Light [Friday, August 9, 2019]

Heyy ♥ My long-term vision is getting clearer. 🙂 I can now explain it better to you as well: When the D.O.C.I.S. Store is finished, the Fangs Store will disappear. This post is called First Light, because with an impression of the D.O.C.I.S. Store home page being finished and doing my first potential apartment visitation in Antwerp, an impression of what my life will look like from the end of October is in sight. Today I haven’t added that many books to the store yet. I’m almost home now after visiting my first potential apartment in Antwerp. I can see…

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Online Diary, Popular Posts

Great Prospects [Thursday, August 8, 2019]

Yesterday, I didn’t post here. Writing a blog post takes quite some time. Time I used to make efficient D.O.C.I.S. progress (and make soup and do other duties). What is visible in The D.O.C.I.S. store now is what I did two nights ago. I spent almost the same amount of time preparing the store back-end and front-end for those 4 books, as I did for 36 books today. The first 4 books, I sought the cover image, updated my assortment details on Excel (including formulating a D.O.C.I.S. Code for each book) and filled out the product page book by book….

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Online Diary, Popular Posts

More Yays [Tuesday, August 6, 2019]

Hiii ♥ ♥ ♥

I have such interesting fun to share with you today! And also one thing that is a lot less fun. I’ll start with the non-fun. Let’s get that over with:

It was my first time seeing the sluice tunnel in action

To many this might sound crazy, but now I have proof that the tunnel(s) in the dyke around my neighborhood will function as sluices to protect Rotterdam when the IJssel floods. (I explained this in practice on August 2 and have plenty of posts in which I express my worry about this.) When I was young, in primary school, I have learnt to accept this fate that comes with living in a sort of human sacrifice neighborhood. But I still don’t want to die unnoticed, in case it happens: a new watersnoodramp. There are water management strategies in the case of flood, as you can see on the above image (…[I expected a more massive type of door instead of a garage door…]), but there are no people management/evacuation strategies. (I know saving everyone is impossible, but to at least prevent the loss of Dutch (and Surinamese) intellectual heritage that lives forth in people, by saving some people…) That’s why I’m sharing this (and the powerless paranoia it causes) with my international audience of blog readers.

That was the non-fun. I wanted to show you this door on the day I went to Egmond, because that was the first day they were doing tunnel maintenance, but then it was still open. When I was on my way to have dinner with a friend in Rotterdam yesterday evening, though I already took my bike in case of a detour, I was hoping the tunnel would still be open, because that would save me a detour of over 10 minutes. But if it weren’t closed, I wouldn’t have had the chance to share this with you. 🙂

Which brings me to the yays: yesterday was so much fun! I’ve been lucky to have met such a kind soul. I’m so happy to have met someone who is also an intelligent and ambitious, creative and independent thinker. I feel like we’re a genuine inspiration to each other. And she has proposed such great growth opportunities! Of the exact details I don’t want to reveal too much, especially because my little web-empire is not finished yet and want it to be an asset to our names when it is brought forward officially, but [confirmed rumor] I might get the chance to speak for a professional audience [my idea to speak of “Evolving individualism in the 9 – 5 economy” would then be a (then published) essay based on which I’ll speech has to be approved higher up first] and D.O.C.I.S. International might function as official research publisher of work written by her. Many yays for D.O.C.I.S. if it can finally start to function as an international medium for other people as well instead of just me! 😀 ♥

I’ve had such fun my meowww. Laughing and sharing ideas as well. Unfortunately I didn’t take any pictures and don’t have any other physical reminders of this memorable fun moment, but I know this will be stored as a happy memory and I have the memory written down in my paper diary as well. (Spontaneous idea I just got: if we’d do a research book campaign internationally, we should do a photo shoot for it. 😀 ) Haha I asked her if she still wants to be associated with me after Facebook and Instagram marked my content as “too controversial to publicly show”, and she didn’t even say “no” ahahahaha yay. 😀 I thought she didn’t want to be friends with me, when I didn’t hear from her after I sent her a message. But I understand replying later meow I do that very often myself. Now she has moved to Rotterdam for her 4th year academic internship, which is awesome. 🙂 I’ve mentioned when I first met her, at the HBR Executive Event in Amsterdam in April.

I was quite nervous about making a new friend, because I have been living in isolation for 3 years hahaha… I was afraid that nerves from not knowing how to have friendship-like conversation anymore would make me act weird – I just worry about leaving a good impression a lot – or that it might become awkward, or that I’d get lost in explaining why I’m not a schizophrenic (ahahahahahahahaha I’m happy I succeeded in completely avoiding the topic haha yay milestone), or that I would have to adapt and end up talking about things that don’t interest me, but none of this happened! Absolutely none meow I’m so happy I could just be myself without any worries about the way I behave. 😀 What made me even happier is that she has so many creative ideas and also takes action for it. I appreciate this so much that I seriously almost wanted to cry out of happiness when I was on my way home. Not often do I experience situations in which I can be myself and someone understands me when I explain myself, and then be able to see that person more than just once. And then also recognize thoughts and traits of myself in her. 😮 (In most situations I keep re-explaining myself in different words and at some point just give up and not talk about myself at all anymore, but with her I didn’t have to do any of that.)

Hopefully this blog post isn’t creepy or attached-sounding to her… Though to long-term growth and friendship yays. 😀

In other news… I’ve improved my recipe for pancakes by using both cow milk and coconut milk, along with vanilla sugar, vanilla essence, cinnamon, raisins and skinned apples.

coconut milk pancakes

More yaysss

And another yay is that I’ll be in Berchem on Friday to check out a potential apartment.

For the rest of today – for my D.O.C.I.S. renovation progress is a day-to-day thing – I’ll be:

  • Fixing The D.O.C.I.S. Store logo
  • Updating The Store’s product catalog and payment gateways (iDeal payment support will be there from around September though…)
  • (Start with) personalizing Terms & Conditions, the Return Policy and the Privacy Policy

And then later up will be the book club page and the home page. When the store is finished, I’ll update the links on the D.O.C.I.S. International website and the content of the website itself (and try to make it look a little less plain HTML-ish). After that I’ll be working on Wikipedia pages for my endeavor and I. 😀 (And after that will be Curaçao!)

May we all have another day of yays. ♥

xxx

Photo by Irina Iriser from Pexels

Online Diary

Monday, August 5, 2019

Heyy ♥

To work more efficiently, I’ll post one status update a day again, instead of multiple ones per day.

Last night I came back home after spending about two weeks in Egmond. Now there are 18 days left before going to Curaçao, where I’d like to relax without having to think of unfinished D.O.C.I.S. related things or about finding an apartment in Antwerp, so I’m working on those things now.

I hope to notify you with positive news about finished websites, having found an apartment and campaigning the D.O.C.I.S. book club, soon.

xxx

The featured image is from Secret Garden on Pexels.com

Ex Animo, Polls, Random questions, Reflections

I want to C you

Actually, this is not much of a poem. More uncontrolled prose.

Over 550 blog posts, all written from the perspective of my eyes. Are they not provocative enough? 🙁 I can’t hear you. Why?

Over 206,000 / 206.000 (two hundred and six thousand) [international writing] words, written in the perspective from me to you. You, whose beautiful eyes are going over this page. What do you see?

Are you A, B or C?

I want to know. Not only your perspective. Also the perspective “you to me”.

I hope it’s different from what I’m used to. I hope you’re C.

You see, I can’t hear people’s internal dialogues when they talk to me. But I can estimate them by asking questions and reading their body language.

My powers never reach the core, though I try. What is going on in your outmost personal layer? Especially now that my writing has reached it, but I haven’t. (Not yet? 🙂 )

Why I want to know? Because I’m an ambitious, affectionate and cuddly person and I want to know if you’re that person too. Society doesn’t embrace that openness, but we should.

When I study anyone’s behavior, I see their attitude towards the world. But I can’t see if they’re A, B or C, without getting hurt. I’ve never reached the core.

What is your attitude towards me? A, B or C?

The Cuddle

“I really admire her. I love what she’s doing. I wish I could do it myself.

Where her theories come from, I don’t know. I need more proof to be able to trust it. My own life would become damaged if I go all-in on this and it turns out to not be feasible. Like could it still all be schizophrenia and not real? I can’t imagine that that could be the case, but still can’t rule it out if I haven’t seen her theories in practice. Why did she exactly become labeled as a schizophrenic anyway? I still have the feeling that there’s a lot more to that story.

Everything that is going on in this world makes it hard for me to trust. Media accusations versus personal counter-accusations. That that will ever be something of the past? The future she portrays sounds too good to be true. I want to believe in it so much, but my heart would become irreparably damaged if I would trust this and it turns out not to be true.

I wouldn’t be able to formulate any theories like hers myself, but if they’re true, I could learn them and implement them in my life. I could use her theories to realize my own dreams and make a living from that. I would love to move to Planet Fang. It feels like there, eternal love and eternal happiness really do exist.

Privacy wise I have nothing about me she may not know. I would love to be her (social) research subject, sharing my thoughts with her, to improve life on Planet Fang. I think I could realize my dreams, doing what I want in life and also being part of D.O.C.I.S. International.”

B

The Demon

“I want to have sex with her. I want to do that every day. But I can’t love. I don’t love her. Though she should love me so that I can have her with me for the rest of my life. I will tell her I love her so that she will tell me the same.

To let her become the royalty she wants to be? No. I will make sure that that won’t happen. If there’s anyone who deserves to be the last new royalty introduced to the world, it’s me. I want the money and fame. If she gets it before me then I will make sure that I’m with her when it happens and eventually cause her downfall and say that I was the mastermind behind everything.

She says that she wants to create a better world blah blah. We all know that that is not realistic. Because the whole world is like me and I love to watch people clash. If it doesn’t happen naturally then I’ll cause it. It’s my favorite topic of conversation. Life is boring without clashes.

Haha that she’s diagnosed with schizophrenia is great news to me.  It’s hilarious, really. And that she went missing and that that went viral and stuff hahaha. She’s always emphasizing that she is a good person and now all of that effort was all for nothing. She’s a demon too and I will get her to confess this, to seal the fact that she’ll never make it. I can’t wait to dry her tears of failure.

If I’m jealous of her? Nooo she shouldn’t think that she’s better than I. I don’t really understand most of her theories, but I still memorize everything so that I can make it look like I’m the mastermind behind D.O.C.I.S. International, when the time is right.

I will lie about my personality in her research so that I can gain access to the highest layers of Planet Fang. That is what my talent is: using sneak tactics to climb up the ladder.

Life should stay exactly like it is.  I have it good and she may not have it better than I. If she gets money then I want to get it too. Love does not exist. I love her deception, acting like she can improve the world. If I can’t improve the world, then no one can. I don’t want to see anyone get successful with that.”

C

The Graeyniss

“I love her. I’m in love with her. We’re soul mates. But I don’t tell her this. I’m afraid she will reject me. I’d rather not let my dreams of using my intelligence to destroy the system together with the love of my life come true and find happiness in her online reality, than feel the eternal sting of her potential rejection. Even though it’s just a probability statement.

I can relate to every single word she writes and/or says. It’s like she speaks of my life instead of hers. I have felt so alone in my intelligence for so long. I can’t believe that she’s real. This is more mental comfort than I could have ever asked for. This is what I have missed all my life. Now I know that I’m not alone.

I have a lot of self-formulated theories, too. Some are similar to hers, some are different. Intelligent people often make the same observations and realizations.

That I could start a new life with her sounds like an absolute dream. But it’s such a great risk for my current career and my family. Even though these attachments are just mental concepts. I should choose me, like she says I should. Chances are high that we will be successful. That we will write history… I want my name in the history books too, as part of her story…

I’m afraid that my emotional problems will make her run away from me like other people in my life do. But she sounds like it will actually draw us closer and make us stronger than we already are. Fully immune against demons.

From her words it sounds like our attraction will be mutual. But that really sounds too good to be true. Either way, life is so boring and I really want the challenge she offers. I want to be part of the board of D.O.C.I.S. International.”

What will be the future of us?

If you’re A, I would allow you to live on Planet Fang. I would absolutely love to meet you. I find it important to know how I can make my stratrgies better suit your ambitions, so that my power on Planet Fang will not bother you. We will not physically spend eternity together, for if you can’t formulate theories like mine by yourself I will have so much to explain and that will hold me back, but mentally we will still always be together. You will be in my thoughts often. Your life on Planet Fang will be the best ever.

If you’re B, you will not gain access to Planet Fang. You’re a disease to good people. I can’t wait to kill you with my bare hands. The next war this world will know will be the war against you and your fellow demons.

If you are C, I love you just as much as you love me. We are complements. I can’t even be successful without you and I don’t want to do this without you, even if I could! You have the intelligence and affection I need.

Would you vote honestly if you knew that your choice could mean instant death? I’ll classify the world in A, B, C, regardless if you vote or not, for your digital footprint reveals enough, and my A’s and C’s will live their best lives.

The featured image is from wpclipart.com.

Online Diary, Popular Posts, Reflections, Strategy

D.O.C.I.S.’s Transition Phases [Saturday, August 3, 2019]

My fellow Fangyists, ♥ Today’s Diary Theme Today’s diary post is focused on further enlightning you about the Determined Observant Colloquial Intelligent Stratagem. Many texts of mine have been devoted to this, but they all won’t be as open-hearted and clear as this one. At the end of today, we all know: All Stratagem related terms that are Fangyist (including the meaning of the word Cishes in Cuddle [now that it’s pride week and I recently learnt that there is another meaning for the word, plus I have some things else about that to share]) What phases the Stratagem has…

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Images, Media, Online Diary, Videos

Getting at it [Friday, August 2, 2019]

Good morning 🙂 ♥ How was your night? & What will you be doing today? I wonder if you also have some layers of honesty you were keeping to yourself (which is not lying but simply avoiding unnecessary crises). Because I’d love to learn from your experience. Meow I’ve completely lost my straightforwardness. Every time I want to speak my mind, the idea of what type of responses I’ll get makes me stay silent. Maybe I should just keep the peace until I’m in Antwerp (not the US because that is currently too expensive for me, plus I have D.O.C.I.S….

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Online Diary, Popular Posts

August :| [Thursday, August 1, 2019]

Heysss ♥ This is such a trippy sight! I can’t believe that it’s August already. It feels like 2019 has barely started and meanwhile it’s coming to an end. August is, internationally, ~the~ month of taking breaks. But D.O.C.I.S. won’t be participating in that for the year is coming to an end and I’m still not closer to the accomplishment of my goals than in 2017. That is why I’m stating some “before September 24th” objectives: Finish the online presentation of D.O.C.I.S. International Currently, everything of me online is all half-finished (or not even half-finished). Of course I can’t finish…

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Explicit Content, Images, Media, Online Diary, Popular Posts, Videos

Calm Lonelyay [Wednesday, July 31, 2019]

My Graeynissis ♥ [ = My 10% most intelligent yays ♥ ♥ ♥ ] Thank you for checking in on me today. ♥ Just the thought that someone understands all that I’m rambling on here makes me feel like maybe some day I’ll get the help I need to permanently break contact with all of my current social circle and become a happy and healthy person. I’m being held in a social, financial and legal deadlock so I really can’t do this all alone. What happened yesterday is proof of this. [Long and detailed build-up to explaining why I refused…

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Online Diary, Strategy

Less Phone Again [Tuesday, July 30, 2019]

Heys my Graeysss ♥ ♥ ♥

Yesterday was yays.  I chilled with my aunt we had a day of snacking fries and talking. I like that I can relate to her troubles so much. It makes me feel less alone.

Through the day I had a song stuck in my head because of this:

It was my intention to not answer to anything yesterday, but had seen this ASKfm “question” and I just couldn’t figure out what it meant. Until I thought of pronouncing it in a non-speaking way. It’s a song of which the chorus (translated to English) is: “Ai ai Olga if you don’t love me I will jump into the ice cold Volga (river in Russia),” about love-related suicide basically. I remember a teacher in primary school teaching us this song ugh what an awful memory. And in this “question” context it filled me with a sense of guilt.

I didn’t want to believe it. Not again.  I really thought why do the people I’m in to always reject me/run away from me and why do I get chased by people who I’m not in to? I have rejected so many people and I really really really don’t like to do that because I know how much it hurts and I don’t want anyone else to feel that way.

Especially the baby emoji made me uncomfortable. The times I have rejected a “I want to start a family with you,” (often hearing that from someone I barely know) is not countable on my fingers.

But I had to be honest and say that there are plenty of fishes in the sea because I don’t want to end up in a relationship I don’t want to be in. I need someone influential with whom I can start a revolution with and yays find attractive. Someone who will make me never reject anyone ever again, if you know what I’m sayin’. 🤔 (Just say “Leave my girlfriend alone please godverdomme” or something…)

Other than that I don’t have much to say about yesterday.

I do have something sad-ish but positive to mention about a few weeks ago, which I hadn’t mentioned here yet: I got a letter from the Belastingdienst in which the inspector stated that she has noticed that I, in 2017, have suffered a loss on my personal bank account(s) and that they are going to study this more starting by analyzing my finances from 2014 onwards. As long as they don’t give me a fine for having suffered a loss (like how paying a bill late comes with an administration fine and losses mean less tax money coming in right), that sounds like quite good news. Maybe they’ll give me back what I’ve lost? Maybe they’ll see that my family is fraud? It could be the yays. 🙂

Today I’ll be phoneless beach chilling, cooking pasta and later escorting my aunt and cousin (who has been claimed by the – I recognize from the way they treat each other compared to when I was little – oppressive new friend she met here) to the bus station. Tomorrow is basically my only other day alone. (When I fell for this it really sounded like I’d have some real time off you know.) Thursday my parents are coming to stay here until the end and my sister will come here too with a gang of friends large enough to fill this cramped space with air beds. I feel claustrophobic. Despite all of this:


You should know that I love to just sit and talk. It’s what I do with my family, it’s what I used to do with my friends. My problem is just that I seek this hard-to-find type of conversational depth. Is that you, my Graeyniss? 😸

Yays for the comments here.

As for D.O.C.I.S. International I’m still tired (is this heart failure¿) and I need Wi-Fi to be able to “finish” anything, so that niss will be continued from August 5 onwards. Though in the meantime I’m also going to visit some apartments in Belgium with my mother to see which one is the most yay to move in to. I’ve already gotten a crush on a two-bedroom one in a quiet neighborhood near-campus… Hoping no one else gets that same crush before I’ve visited it… 😀

I’ll be having another keeping-phone use-minimal day.

Love you more than yesterday ♥

Updated 08:29 (AM) [Timezone GMT +2 (Amsterdam;CEST)]

– xxx –

Phone water
Online Diary, Popular Posts, Reflections

Flashback “Chilling” [Monday, July 29, 2019]

Good morning, my Graeyniss ♥

Passion is finished yaysss. 🙂 I don’t know if you’ve spotted it last night, because I updated the last of it pretty late last night. It’s a veryyy nice read, seeing how it sticks together from start to finish:

Passionlilfangs.com/passion

Passion 2lilfangs.com/passion-2

Passion 3lilfangs.com/passion-3

Passion 4lilfangs.com/passion-4

Passion 5lilfangs.com/passion-5

I’m in bed, writing you early because today I’ll be full-time spending time with my aunt, cousin and her new friend who are staying here. I spend far too much time with my phone in my hands I’m missing out on reality. 🙁

But before I go, I’d like to share some feelings of mine I’m dealing with, hoping for your listening ear: especially after sharing those screenshots of the type of “conversations” I have every day and the amount of degrading ASKfm questions that pour in whenever I answer just one of them (at some point I just stop answering because it’s just too much time and energy wasted for nothing… I still have questions in my answers queue from that same day), I see and feel more of the disrespected reality I live. It’s not nice. 🙁 I’ve been keeping myself from online conversations more and more ever since this realization (again). Chances are high I won’t respond to anything today, but still maybe post a few tweets in case I’m bored.

Another thing I’ve been afraid to share is this: https://ask.fm/docis_/answers/155733411360?utm_source=copy_link&utm_medium=android

I dared to share this new piece of fraud evidence now, because my parents left last night. They will be back – with my sister and her friends – on Thursday. I’m always afraid that my father will beat me to death when I check-mate him with evidence on his fraud. But people don’t believe this is real or something? I don’t know why I’m not saved from all the dangers I live. 🙁 I hope the government has its eyes on him because this really is not normal. I don’t want to be a part of this anymore. 🙁 I’m not a fan of the system either but if we’d all do what they’re doing the financial crisis that will follow would be untamable.

I hope that, considering that with those screenshots I have now shared all aspects of my life, what I’m trying to do as a propagandist is clear and people will see the good in this and work with me. It would bring us to the revolution that will better our lives. I hope that it will work out and that I – though it’s still a better alternative than forever living together with my family – won’t have to live all by myself in a city where I don’t know anyone, don’t know who to trust, where I could be treated like just another student, while my intelligence is clearly different and I’m this online phenomenon spitting ideas, who can be followed anywhere. I really don’t want to meet another person telling me “Oh you’re so beautiful blah blah,” while I can’t talk about the actual contents of my mind (like seriously let’s revolutionize the system) and then end up in this weird sexual relationship being offended “because I don’t say much and I’m weird”. Please. 🙁

I’m going to take a little nap because I couldn’t sleep last night. I hope you’ll help me start the largest court case ever one day. From there we could initiate the D.O.C.I.S. 🙂 .

With all of the formerly forgotten toxic flashbacks that are haunting me now, I’m starting to realize how the D.O.C.I.S. I initiated 2 years ago, before the memory loss thing happend, sticks together.

Love you ♥

Updated 08:56 (AM) [Timezone GMT +2 (Amsterdam; CEST)]

~~~

Phone water

The featured image is made by Designecologist on Pexels.com

Online Diary, Popular Posts, Reflections

Passion 5 [Sunday, July 28, 2019]

Heys ♥ Welcome to the last post of my list of passions. 🙂 The last two topics on my list have a lot of elements from the other topics on my list in them. Before I continue, I’d like to log these tweets here for diary purposes: Currently pic.twitter.com/u8ayHROlbT — The Fangs (@LilFangs_) July 27, 2019 It’s remarkable how much the sea has drawn to the coast in such a short matter of time with such steady seeming weather circumstances. 🙂 What can politics do for online harassment @MinPres @thierrybaudet @realDonaldTrump @HawleyMO? — The Fangs (@LilFangs_) July 27, 2019 I…

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Audio, Media, Online Diary, Popular Posts, Reflections, Videos

Passion 4 [Saturday, July 27, 2019]

Hey ♥ I can’t sleep again. 🙁 Many thoughts and passions are keeping me awake. The main reason why I’m awake is my fifth out of seven most satisfied (thus not that satisfied at all) passion, which is also where I left off in my previous post: sex/intimacy. So I figured why not just continue writing my post when my mind is yearning for the satisfaction of this passion the most. 🙂 Before I start, I also want to mention that another thing that is keeping me awake is my desire to live alone, about which I’m more than fully…

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passion 3
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Passion 3 [Friday, July 26, 2019]

Heysss I’m all yours now my meowww 😻 Taxes x_x The dishes are handwashed and my tax report for the second quarter of 2019 has been submitted. I’m just glad that it’s done. The numbers are really fucked up. 😢 I run this business from my personal account and have suffered a personal loss of €11.370. It always surprises me how much all of my little transactions are in total.  A fixed income through a student loan when I become a full-time student in September is the easiest and most time-related suitable way to build up healthy finance (including being…

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Images, Online Diary, Popular Posts, Reflections

Passion 2 [Thursday, July 25, 2019]

Heysss ♥ Welcome back to my list of passions and desires. 🙂 Tuesday I promised to show you more pictures of where I’m staying once I’m alone, so here they are: I just washed the remainder of yesterday’s dishes and ate my cruesli. Now I’ll take a quick shower, tidy that one room that is messy with all my stuff in it, install myself underneath the parasol here until after the Sun has reached its peak hotness, show you more of my list, flip a pancake, cycle some and find another place to write again. My dinner will be left-overs…

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Online Diary, Popular Posts, Reflections

Passion [Wednesday, July 24, 2019]

Good afternoon ♥ This is one of those days where what I’ll do today is not diverse enough to devote a diary day theme to it, so I devote it to the theme or feeling that has the most influence on my heart at the moment I start writing the post. My mind is distressed and simultaneously kept sane by different types of passion. Mischief, unachieved goals and unsatisfied desires keep me awake at night; my causes of the feelings of guilt that come with sin, weighing me down, while they’re not even great sins. Luckily I’m working towards the…

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Images, Online Diary, Popular Posts

Beach Yays 2day [Tuesday, July 23, 2019]

The cottage/cabin is exactly how I remember it. When I was younger, everything seemed a lot bigger though. To some people, this is a shed. But it’s great meoww it’s just us Catjes and the countryside. 🙂 ♥ This is where I’ll be sleeping the coming two weeks. Some days my family will be here, some days (when they’re back to work and stuff) I’ll be alone. A huge moth just flew into this room (so my initial reaction was to hide underneath the sheets lol). But now that I want to take a picture of it to show you…

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Images, Online Diary, Popular Posts

Peace and Quiet [Monday, July 22, 2019]

The coming two weeks I’ve been looking forward to. Some peace and quiet. 😻 We’ll be relaxing in a quiet coastal area, away from the business of the city. In a simple Dutch holiday cottage. 10 minutes away from the beach (a less touristic one 🙂 ) by bicycle. I haven’t been there in at least 10 years! I’ve been told the home has been modernized. It’s the holiday home of friends of my mother I’ve spent a lot of time with when I was little. Today, before my mother, sister and I leave (solar panels will be placed at…

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Empowerment [Sunday, July 21, 2019]

The empowerment I need are written words that put my mind at ease. They are separate from race, gender et cetera. It’s is about the experience of being an individual in general. We all experience the mind and the same Universe. Just being should always feel comfortable. I want to transfer this feeling of empowerment to the both of us, my dear reader(s). The way we’ll confidently be our intelligent and creative selves and wear this the way peacocks wear their feathers. 😻 My insecurities often cause shortness of breath and I don’t want that anymoreee. (Can you relate to…

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Images, Online Diary, Popular Posts, Recipes

Chill Mode [Saturday, July 20, 2019]

Woww meow I slept from yesterday afternoon until now. Good morning ♥ I feel quite rested. 😸 There’s still quite some work to do until I feel completely zen again (it has been a few years), so I’ll be working on that today. Until I feel zen, I won’t be working on my other web domains to earn something and make a name for myself. I’ll be chilling until my mind is at ease (though finances play a huuuuge role in that, I should depressurize for a while). I hope you’ll chill along with me today. 🙂 It feels like…

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Antwerpiyays 😸 [Friday, July 19, 2019]

In French, it is Anvers. In Dutch/Flemish it’s Antwerpen. I woke up to the word Antwerpiyays, so in Cuddle, Fangyism’s official dialect, it’s Antwerpiyays now. 😸 Though I rarely speak this dialect of mine… Only when I feel comfortable and cuddly, somewhere far into a conversation, I might unveil my inner Fangyist. She’s still vulnerable and developing. Getting a bachelor’s degree, though in conflict with my principles this society doesn’t acknowledge extraordinary intelligence without one so I have no choice, is a great step in this process. To find and teach new information and revolutionize our society with this. I’ll…

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Online Diary, Popular Posts, Strategy

Hmmm… Let’s do Nothing :D [Thursday, July 18, 2019]

I guess we don’t enjoy looking ahead. It’s important, though. But I’ll save it for when we really have to, then. I didn’t enjoy yesterday that much either. To get to the point where I own this big broadcasting center (of books, magazines, entertainment videos, entertaining audio, and actual news broadcasts), own large parts of land world-wide and provide them with living facilities [get itt subtly building my own countryay 😀 ] – using mathematics for translating all changes and policies et cetera to the large scale – I just wanted to start setting everything up with my personal funds…

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Online Diary, Popular Posts, Random questions, Reflections, Strategy

Looking Ahead [Wednesday, July 17, 2019]

Heys my Catje 😸 ♥ Let’s spend today looking ahead. There are many different contexts and scopes in which this can be done. For example thinking of next month’s budget for business operations today, or today thinking of what your dinner will be tomorrow. In what ways will you be looking ahead? I would love to exchange ideas. 🙂 Is it stressful but good (especially when you’ve spent enough time thinking about it) to you as well? I will be re-estimating my store development progress and process to something that won’t make me pass out every time I’ve worked on…

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Online Diary, Popular Posts, Random questions

I want to relax but I also want to see results day 108764919 [Tuesday, July 16, 2019]

My Catje 😻 Where are my Cuddles? 🙁 Here I am again, talking us through this dilemma I’m facing, as time passes us by all these years. As you know, the best thing that could happen to me is being given some responsibility regarding the future people management that stems from contemporary water management. Please. Please. Please… I know you’re reading thisssssss. People always have something to complain about, but I’m sure that they’ll love you for saving The Fangs. Not because of who I am but because helping out someone else is a way of contributing to society and…

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Online Diary, Popular Posts, Strategy

New Starting Point Hi [Monday, July 15, 2019]

Hi. 🙂 ♥ This is my new starting point. By that I mean that I’m trying to get my audience, my progress and our achievements in sync by recalibrating this website of mine, calling this post “Starting Point”. In one of my “Kicking back to Kick off Kicking off” and “Het experiment” videos, I mention that some moments in my diary I’ve chosen to start explaining everything from scratch again, because it’s a lot of work catching up if you are a new visitor / don’t read my work. Then my dilemma became “How am I going to explain that…

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