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stress

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Lil Tension [Wednesday, July 3, 2019]

11:29 (AM) Good morning ♥ Cold Feet Meoow the tension I feel now is intense 🙁 . The decline of stress I spoke of is, I realize now, that after the Summer this is all over and I can finally start to get happy (though the road to professorship is fuuuucking long and costly…). But in the meantime there are at least three months for me here where I’ll still have to endure these lowkey tense social situations and be without money. I woke up with the thought: The prospect of having my studies in Belgium as my occupation is…

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Sunday, January 13, 2019

13:58 (01:58 PM) Good afternoon ♥ I couldn’t sleep last night, from the excitement (and light stress about the possibility of being rejected) for studying to obtain a bachelor (and hopefully being able to do this “the apprentice way”, receiving guidance for the research projects I’ve already broken down, instead of doing it via the regular homework -> test, homework -> test, homework-> test -> thesis, way). I’ve already written down what I’ll include in my motivation letter. At first I wanted to settle for only econometrics, or maybe philosophy on top of that as well, but if I’d listen…

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Saturday, January 12, 2019

00:52 (12:52 AM)  Meoww my heart rate, the warmth, slight hunger and my thoughts, are keeping me awake. I’m going to eat a Berliner bun, we also bought at the supermarket before driving here.  I’m so curious about what today will bring. I know I’m severely ill and as soon as that is officially spoken out – and my mother hears it from a source she does find trustable – I’ll have to undergo multiple forms of treatment and restore. Truthfully, I want to do all of this in Germany. I don’t even want to go back to the Netherlands…

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