17:27 (05:27 PM) 

My Cuddle! ♥

I have missed you far too much!!! I never want to feel like that again 🙁 . I’m going back to writing diary posts. 

So many feelings were left unexpressed, when I decided to hold myself from doing it. I had a lot of extra time to think and strategize, though, so I have a lot to tell you 🙂 . 

The impulse to re-open my diary, popped up ten minutes ago, as I looked outside, through the gap through which I can see the sky, in the blinds-shut bedroom I have claimed, here in Amsterdam.  

That impulse gave me the impulse to also leave this bed, take a shower, eat some, and catch some Sun Down Sun, while I still can. While I do that, I’ll tell you everything. 

So I’ll be right back xxx


20:19 (08:19 PM) 

My impulsive plans changed after the spontaneous visit from my parents, because they were stuck in traffic and decided to stop by. I was socializing, until I left to visit the cinema. 

Anyway, compared to the last time I wrote the diary post, I have a written down (the financial aspects of) my campaign strategy now, for potential investors 🙂 . 

Other than that, aside for some random setbacks, nothing has changed since then. Ohh except two things:

  1. I made my room in Amsterdam tidy. (That sounds like a very random thing to mention, but it was veryyy extreme haha…)
  2. My mother has e-mailed my B on behalf of me. About 45 minutes ago. 

Now before I start giving myself hope again and stuff – hope of doing what I’ve been doing alone all this time, together with my B – I just want to express my unknowingness. 

Some conversations ago, when we were speaking of my B againnn, she started to speak of a DNA test. 

Internally, I thought: Why the fuck does she start about a DNA test? She told me that she had never spoken to him before. I spoke of that before in my diary. My last name is Elia? 

I audiotaped the conversation in which she started about it. 

Anywayy. I’m adding this text way past twelve. I should start another post xd. Halfway through the added piece above, I stopped writing. Now I’m twisting my afro, so I won’t get to writing anytime soon.