22:06 (10:06 PM)
Hi Cuddle
What did you have for dinner today?

Another nice day has passed. I had breakfast around nine. I had a bagel, of which I put strawberry jam on one side and apple jam on the other. Actually, I wanted to have strawberry jam on both. (But I really don’t like asking for things…) (I didn’t put both bagel sides on top of each other, haha. I ate them separately.) And I had some oatmeal with cinnamon and something else.

After that, I wanted to go back to my room to take a nap. Yesterday, when I wanted to extend my stay, the girl (with such cute fangs) at the reception told me the policy is to wait until the day itself. So today, I went to the reception to extend my stay. I decided to not transfer the remaining amount on my debit card to my prepaid credit card, because it might not be transferred at the moment I need it. (It takes about 24 hours and I heard that I was going to fly home on Wednesday, on Monday. So the chance that, if I’d transfer the amount of an extended room to my prepaid card on Monday afernoon, the amount would be on my card by Tuesday morning, was way too small.) It was better to just leave it on my debit account and pay for the room in cash, like I did in previous hotels.

Apparently this hotel doesn’t accept cash. My mother’s credit card was expired, and booking for the room via iDeal (that’s basically the Dutch paypal for debit accounts), wasn’t accepted here, because I needed the card to confirm the booking. My mother solved it, though (I definitely have this “fast pace problem solving skill” from her), by using my father’s card to book it via Expedia. <3!
I didn’t take the nap I wanted to take (since I went to sleep around three and had to get up for breakfast around eight), because I was busy with my mom and I was a little bit worried about having to travel again with this suitcase that has a broken back wheel and then having to pay for a restaurant again, because I probably wouldn’t get a room with a kitchen again, and then hope the other hotel does accept cash, et cetera. I had to fix the reservation extention issue before twelve. After going down the elevator a second time, to see if it worked out, and it did, the guy at the reception asked me to write a very good review in which I mention him, because everything worked out well. And I did. Here’s my review: https://goo.gl/maps/Z4b2ti4pBsD2. I added the part about the cute fangs girl just before I posted the link. I think it’s very fair mentioning her, too. Too bad I’m not sure about what her name is.

… I had dinner and jasmine tea (from Paris, haha (that was from around the time I started this blog)) for lunch. After that, I went to the pool. I basically spent the day “baantjes trekkend” [Dutch for swimming back and forth across the length of the pool, but literally translated, it’s “pulling little rows”] and working on my start-up business for Project Nosce Te Ipsum. I’ve written down all factors I had to take into consideration, from start to finish (of the “start-up phase”), from the order in which I need to do things, to finances.

So, yesterday I mentioned that yesterday was a new starting point and that my future looks so much brighter, and that I was going to tell you why. Here’s why: it’s because yesterday I came up with the idea to secretly start another business. Secretly in the sense that my parents [or at least my father… My mother tends to just agree with what he says, because, when they’ve made a “parental decision”, they tend to bring the news as one body that has reached a consensus] don’t want me to do business, so I won’t tell them about it. They’re scared the Dutch Tax Agency comes empty the house because of “my lousy bookkeeping”/me being behind on tax bills/me not filing my tax reports. Fam… If that ever happens, the Belastingdienst (Dutch Tax Agency) or FIOD (Dutch Fraud Police) barging in the house, it’s because my father has been committing fraud since the day he started his business… Or even before he started it, if the expenses from then were “the costs to start the business” (“actually known as” family dinners and takeout eaten while watching Family Guy).

But I’ll be moving out, so the address of the business will be my home address (omgg I’m gonna have a home addresssss :DDDDD). In my home, no one will ask me questions about what I’m doing, with the intention of stopping me from doing it. (I don’t think my mother would actually want to stop me. It’s because my father says she’s too helpful and not strict. And now, “because I failed”, everything is her fault.)

The business will cover all components of the multinational holding that will thrive from Project Nosce Te Ipsum, in its “baby form”. It’s a quite bulletproof strategy. I’ll now sell items that also attract the mainstream. I have to be able to keep the attention of everyone, and “the leading party now” is “the mainstream” [the hardest party when it comes to keeping someone’s concentration, so I have to do something simple], whose attention I need to start a trend, in which I claim the non-mainstream, who are actually leading the mainstream (I’m talking about musicians, professors and founders of “truly new concepted” businesses, plus individuals who are living creatively out of this “business is life and judge whoever is not in it”-flehniss [“niss” is a Cuddle dialect ending of an English word (I just thought of adding “fleh” to the Urban Dictionary, just like “Liée”)]), but are being pushed around, because they don’t have the primate and thus have a lot of reasons to get judged unnecessarily easily. [I’m going to tell you something about the way I construct sentences at the end of this post.] I mean the “academici” (academia/academics) who focus on getting enlightening insights into this universe, by the way. Not those who are just out to make a name. They can keep doing weird shit for attention. The fuck… STAY AWAY from my project!!! Why does someone want to know the exact number of dead babies/children (in a “developing country”)? EVERY YEAR!?! AND THEN MAKE A TREND??!!? Ew… How does an idea like that come to life¿?¿? They often don’t even do it alone… [Maybe it’s a country with a different culture that now suddenly feels it has to “Westernize” because they’re called “developing” in the world of globalization(?), by the way. Yes, everyone needs water, but not everyone needs a Facebook account… (So I’m saying things like internet access and being able to celebrate your child’s birthday at McDonalds doesn’t say anything about the wealth of a country. What needs to get fixed is the access to basic facilities. For that, D.O.C.I.S. International doesn’t need a government. We can solve this. Globally.)] Fucking creep. It’s already bad that it happens. Why do you want to dig into the numbers…? Invest that time [and those HUGE funds TO JUST LOOK INTO SOME FUCKING EXCEL FILES FROM HOSPITALS… (and then still blow up the numbers, huh?) It’s just dropping by, phoning, or [the most “business” thing of this age [“omg I have so many of them”, “even on a holiday, I just HAVE to check it”, “you never guess who responded to my message”, “I use it for procrastination”, “blah blah blah”]:] e-mailing all hospitals/funeral centers/graveyards in a country. You really don’t need years, entire armies of scientists and millions of dollars for that…] in finding a proper solution to it… You’re using it to say: “This is “Wakambe”. (*insert very traditional sounding name*) Wakambe eats three grains of rice a day. Help him eat four grains of rice a day, by donating just $4 a week,” and then fill your own pockets… With all those charity projects, the world could have looked so much different already… (Especially with those European/western food surpluses… Just give it away?)

[In case you wonder why I’m not even going to bother getting a PhD, etc.: it already takes “half your life span” getting the titles, and then you have to “fight for your life” to get a little bit of attention for the months (years?) of work you put in. And then “the winner’s prize” – when it comes to attention – goes to those who research chaos, destruction and (increasing) profits(!!!), instead of those who focus on prosperity (or just the beautiful wonders of the surface we walk on and everything above and below it). Maybe Nosce Te Ipsum would get noticed a tiny bit, when I’m way dead and my great great gread grandchild decides to dig into who I was or someone opens some “history capsule” with my notebooks in it. If you feel stuck in that world: no worries!!! I’ll have a much better alternative for you, during and after Project Nosce Te Ipsum :D. (That’s also why Project Nosce Te Ipsum is a fully independent research project (I wouldn’t even accept funding from those creepy profit hungry parties), by the way.) Also: cuddle me :D, because I find having dregrees and feeling slight frustration about wanting to get your passionately done research put on a pedestal very sexy. Hehe.]

Fact: one of the main reasons I started this independent research project is to get Cuddles. I’m very easily attracted to a certain type of personality. But in my environment, that type of personality [100% passion, true ambition [= seeing true potential (in yourself)] and love, plus not saying “eww omg ughh” to having to use your brain(s) [the #1 reason for me cringing. I find that “pussy mentality” “ew” (just like saying “pussy”?)]] is a rare find.

So for the coming weeks (I can do this in less than a month), I’ll be making a summer clothing collection (all made by my own hands), turning my websites into official online businesses (https://docis.international will become the Project Nosce Te Ipsum portal and https://lilfangs.com will become the “online start-up” with the summer collection, my blog and a separate section on EVERYTHING you need to know about Project Nosce Te Ipsum), writing episode 0 (a free episode), writing episode 3, making cooking videos, making an intro and outro for my youtube channel and making an online diary “series” on the process of this start-up and project. For the summer collection, I’ll be “screen printing” my shirts by hand. In that way, I can make unique designs (excuse my French, but 90% of today’s t-shirt prints suck because they’re way too similar).

My sole proprietor business will be called “Fangs”. I came up with the name as I was writing my “to do list”.

Why this will work? I’m going to buy followers and views/likes, which will make my work seem popular. Those who stumble upon my page will consider me a more trustworthy and succesful source. (My followers/following is so low right now, my accounts seem like spam accounts…) Even though I am, of course, a very driven and trustworthy source, I guess I need to “buy the status” and have a fake one, before it becomes real. Also, maybe then you, as low-key reader of my blog, who isn’t allowed to associate with “spam accounts”, would suddenly be able to cuddle me whenever? And also, I’ll finally be a “sole proprietor” again. When people ask me what I do, I finally have a proper answer. In fact, I’m back at the same level as I was when I was studying at Erasmus University, but now I don’t have to go to mandatory classes. (I really don’t like obligations like that. Just say “here are your books and on these dates are your tests”. Stop “pampering me”. (Baby context.))

When I buy these followers and “engagement” (likes/views), I need to have them on all my accounts, by the way. Otherwise it won’t seem realistic, haha. “1000 Instagram followers, 50 Twitter followers, 0 subscribers and 20 views on Youtube, no Soundcloud plays other than those of myself….” Ahahahahaha.

I first thought of keeping it to myself. But then I realized, by the time those who don’t know if they want to work with me, reach this post, it won’t matter anyway. Either that person is too judgmental to even participate, or that person is open minded enough to see that even without real followers, I’m still good at what I do. First I thought: “Man, I should have never deleted my accounts, now people will not want to follow me.” But since I can buy 1000 followers for $7 (or less…(?)), that problem is solved. My previous followers (“my friends”) weren’t truly interested in my material anyway. (In the sense that, when I ask them what they’ve done on a free day, it’s: “Watching Netflix all day. I’m so tired et cetera et cetera,” and then later they’re giving me “life advice” because they believe I’m crazy and I need their “just stop it, just don’t think about it, just let it go, just give up” demotivating words to make me feel better.) No, thanks. I’d rather invest in getting an audience (not even necessarily someone to cuddle with, but just someone who enjoys to keep up with my work). Also, it makes a very “wow you have fans”-impression, that I’m following only less than 200 accounts and more than 1000 followers. Call it Fangyism. I never followed a marketing class.

On my sentence structure: I’ve decided to, to make it easier to read for you, use “square brackets” for my in-text comments. Either when they should not be on the foreground, but I still want to mention them, or the comment is in the middle of a sentence. For my end-of-sentence comments, I’m still using normal brackets. To those who are anti long sentences: fleh. From a very young age, I used to get compliments on my writing skills. This stopped when I was in high school. Then it became: “boohoo your sentences are too long.” (And since Nosce Te Ipsum, they have become twice as long.) I like challenging my reader with complex sentences. The only reason people want short sentences is because they’re (believing that they’re) dumb. I’m against over-appreciating simplicity. One of the few things I actually have an opinion on. (There are so many things I don’t give enough fucks about, to form an opinion on/about/over. (Like mis-used grammar. Ugh. As long as the message is clear… Or “Woaah beef between Pusha T and Drake”. Oh my goddddd. Why do people care so much??? What is the “good” in it? Why the fuck do you want to know the details? Why do you list them? You’ve listed them and picked a side. And now what…? Exactly. On to the next one… Nahhh man. When I was 13, I used to dig into that kind of stuff, because I wanted to fit in. (And I did.) Now I see grey haired men do the same thing for a living… Was it a business “back” then, too?)

So I make long sentences, because I consider it an art form. It’s also a taboo, but not to everyone. (I actually started to make long compound sentences, to save time. Can you imagine what Nosce Te Ipsum’s first episode would look like, if I would drastically decrease my amount of compound sentences? Or this post? For episode 0, I do plan on “not saving time” and describing things very clearly, and thus make less long sentences, but I’ll never hide my skill. I want to be the *insert Greek/Roman author name here* of this age. I want, later, in schools, the youth to be scrutinizing Nosce Te Ipsum, with a teacher asking questions like: “Why did Lil Fangs put the comma in this part of the sentence?” I’ve over-thought every single detail. It’s all planned out. (Okay, except the sentences I started, but then I started to write another part of the story that comes after it, before I’ve finished the sentence [the rest of the paragraph], and the other part of the story becomes so long that I either forget about or can’t find the sentence. But I won’t change it, because it’s part of my art. If you want perfectly boring short sentences on another story or “informative lifestyle book” about work life, you’re reading the wrong thing.)

Okay… I wanted to go to sleep “early”, but I also wanted to tell you this, and I know tomorrow I’ll want to tell you a lot of other things as well. I don’t want “work” to stack up. (02:23 (AM)…) [Also, YES, I use “, and”. Never when I list only two things(, though!). It’s for pronounciation and oversight reasons. And when it comes to punctiation, I’m breaking hella rules too. I like it that way. I do it consciously. I know EXACTLY what rules I break. (Dumb flehs telling me I’m a bad writer or telling me I don’t possess a language, for breaking “style rules”……. I stopped using formal language when talking to my professor(s) in an “after class” [“oh boohoo, it’s “lecture”] setting…)]

Good night, my cuddle
I love you so much

PS: I can’t find the part where I mentioned what the length of my lines would be, if I would make less compound sentences [the editor I’m using doesn’t have a ctrl + f (find) function. I say ctrl + f, because that’s what I thought, but I’m actually using my phone to write this. (It also doesn’t have spelling and grammar check. And I don’t want “Grammarly” (I keep coming across this ad…)…))]. But: “If I would write non-compound sentences, the book would have been at least three times as thick and it would have taken three times as much time to write it. That was time I didn’t have, at that time. For episode 0, “I’ll go less compound”, because it will be the “paradepaardje” [*opens “mijnwoordenboek.nl” for a proper translation* (I need example sentences for the context. Google Translate doesn’t have that…)… So I always go to “mijnwoordenboek” [= “mydictionary” (but “yourdictionary” is my fave English online dictionary, by the way… Boiii I have spent DAYS reading example sentences for improving my writing and because it’s better than most books that are released today, when it comes to content and style of writing… I don’t know who has written/selected those, but that person/those people is/are most def my #1 author of all time… After him/her/them, a long list of authors from Antiquity follows…(*drops mic*))] via Google, because that saves typing and waiting for the page to load (most of all). I usually end up on mijnwoordenboek, but this time, I didn’t need a context [of course, the word is so unique and thus already context-specific], Google already showed only one translation and mijnwoordenboek didn’t even have the word in it. It’s)] (showpiece) of Project Nosce Te Ipsum and shallow judgmental people who don’t like using their brains because they’re dumb, need to know they should shut the fuck up and keep their hands off my project… They won’t read this… Unless someone “leaks it” saying “ooooh Lil Fangs is bad and dangerous”. HA! YES! To their corrupt, creepy, disgusting, unnecessarily powerful position, I am!!!

Damn. It’s 02:36 (AM) now.
Okay, now it’s 02:54 (AM). This is what I meant by starting a new paragraph without having finished the previous one. I did finish all of the last paragraph, I think. (Looking back takes too much time…) [Wow. That should be a quote. “Looking back takes too much time.” – Lil Fangs. I SAID IT FIRSTTT! For sureeee. [Since “not putting way too much effort in adjusting your work until it fits the same boring standard as everything else ever published” is “bad”… Bad Fangs… *puts hand in front of mouth and looks fake surprised/guilty*] Looking back in time, thinking about past(-)time, is wasted time, because you want to move and are focused on moving forward.] So I wanted to say something about the time… Yeah, my alarm goes off at 08:40. Luckily I can sleep on the plane (if I finish making my daily/weekly schedule for starting “Fangs”, at the library I’m going to tomorrow, after having checked out).

I’m going to send this update to Jean, and then catch some Z’s. [By not using “, and” when listing two things, I mean, I don’t say: “These are apples, and pears.” This “, and” was a “pronunciation reason”… It’s “pronunciation” and not “pronounciation” isn’t it…?]

(03:06 (AM))

PPS: *yesterday’s reason number 2* (I don’t remember how I formulated it, but I haven’t explained all of it yet, acually)… Oh, yes, I remember: my future looks brighter than ever, because I now see the moment I can truly “sit back and relax”, and watch the numbers grow, while focusing on only innovation of what I already made [okay, or be stressed out because the numbers don’t grow (flehs always mention this), but then, still…], because I now have my business construction. There will be a moment, when I say “we’re open now” (during a “launch party”… (for one…?) I’ve calculated the moment when I’m going to buy my followers… So at least “I’ll go viral” (either only to myself, or you’ll actually see my page go “viral”)) and I’ll officially be done with all the preparations of doing official business. I’ll have a “routine” (but a historically creative one), that won’t require as much stress and effort as now. Liée!