My time to think yesterday got me so many woahs, my meow. My first woah is that this week is a week in which I have 0 plans (hopefully aside from signing the contract for the apartment I’ve slowly fallen in love with :D), after such a long time! Didn’t realize how much my brain needed rest after I wake up the next morning, feeling like just laying down and distracting my mind with technology at least as possible at first. To just let everything that has happend sink in and scrutinize it. (Usually I’m suppressing what is there anyway. Plain reasoning is what I did until I wanted to flea from my realization and tried to escape my thoughts by playing choices romance games on my phone (and Cody Cross 🙂 )) Yesterday, I was in bed until about 6 PM when I went to a birthday party with my family.
The realization of having given my first presentation about my ideas instead of about what a teacher orders me to do is not entirely there still. I wonder what the effect of this will be, because this was something unusual for a presentation in general (for I was doing propagandist things) and any type of societal research is usually not done for free. I wonder about its general effects. If people will go to work with a different view tomorrow.
Furthermore I’m still surprised about how things started off and the results. Surprised about the start because I froze up so badly I didn’t think I would make it to the end. Plus people stopping by to take pictures and videos of me while I was presenting and people dropping by and walking away was taking me out of my concentration. And overhearing “Too slow,” “Too fast,” “My goal for the future is to go to the bathroom now,” and other things like that in conversations. And being way overdressed. I was really surprised to get any positive feedback at all. Though I don’t know if that is honesty or politeness. It doesn’t matter anyway, I really like that a large group of people thought along actively and was willing to share their answers with me.
When it comes to the results, I was very surprised. My coordinates are (40, -50) and the majority of people were in the region -5 < x < 60 and 0 > y > -60. That is very positive in a way, because that means that it’s not the end of the world for most people, when we put a definitive end to the routine the world seems so attached to (because there are so many other ways to do things I really don’ttt understand why so many people on this planet keep living for it if they hate it too).
But if this sample suits the rest of the world, I see the views of right-wing change and left-wing change is what my compass does not reveal. I don’t know how many people would be happy with the D.O.C.I.S. type of change. Something I reallyyy wonder is if the European Union will still have open borders in 10 years, and what this place will look like demographically. Another thing I wonder is why so few people are causing change to the system…? That is what worries me.
What I want to achieve is the implementation of the D.O.C.I.S. International system. How to use my research to push that is what is currently eating me up.
The party yesterday was fun. My cousins celebrated their birthdays together at the community center of their neighborhood, with friends and family over. A lottt of familiar faces asking me about Antwerp, who I could also tell about the interesting discovery of the day before. I’ve talked about the topic of change with them very often in the past and guess the compass would place them in group 4 as well. Next up should be a redefined political compass, I think. Because I’m quite sure that though we all want change, our views of what change should look like differ. (I’m pro closed borders, for example. That creates a better incentive to support your own community first, creates better demographic oversight and is much better for international cooperation (because better demographics create a better idea of what a country’s strengths and needs are, without not knowing where your population has scattered to).)
I don’t talk about my views on closed borders often because when I do it is agressively verbally attacked with arguments about unity and stuff. While I think that closed borders create a different type of unity. It could lead to independent nations cooperating together instead of having the artificial European Union forcing an internal market.
But because views like this differ, I think demographically the world should have people with the same political views living together. Instead of everyone mixed up the way it is now. The unification of similar minds is a different type of peace and happiness.
Anyway what I wanted to say is that my mother’s Volvo broke down last Thursday (reparation costs will be like 4K 🙁 🙁 🙁 ) and that she now drives in one of the types of car I used to arrange for the people whose cases I was handling.
The new Astra is a really chill car and it’s pretty fast for a regular gasoline-powered car. My mother says she wouldn’t mind owning one and if she goes for it or something similar (like she said) I won’t stop her. 🙂
Meoww I’ve broken some speed limits with it driving to the party and back home later. Without tickets of course. 🙂 It’s very different than the turbo diesel Volvo with leather seating though. But this car had some extra yayness over it in a way because it made me think of Tishe so much. It has left this longing I was trying to rid myself from though. Like why is it here if I’m just some lackey. 🙁
Ah yays, I just received my father’s income information as well and have sent my motivation and all income information of my parents and I to the person who manages the apartment I wish to hire. It has been received and will be processed tomorrow, I heard. I really hope the apartment has not been rented to someone else yet.
After all of the party socializing and people saying that they’ll pray (or duimen depending on philosophy) for me getting that apartment, I have become so dreamy about it. I couldn’t sleep last night because I wanted to see how much my dream apartment interior would cost. (I don’t know what my definitive interior styling budget is yet…) But aaaaah check out the highlights:
Okay when I was there there were a lot of people standing in the living room, so I’m using pictures of the estate company’s website (plus shout out to Ikea):
No TV meubel because I don’t want a TV. Like I don’t want a microwave either. I’ll go for paintings and sculptures omg yayyy. 😀
Ah and on the wall that is sort of 3D’d away from the main living room wall, I would like to use school board paint so that I can write out my brainstorm ideas with crayons. Of course I will paint it white again when I move out of this apartment. 🙂
A closet of 2 meters width will be at the wall you can’t see (at the back of the photographer of this picture). I hope my ironing board fits in it.
I’ve chosen more combi’s as well. Like beige hoeslaken with black sheets.
Et cetera meooow I really hope that I will be selected for this apartment. 😀 (Plus if not, I’ll probably have a very hard time in 2 weeks… 🙁 )
Meow meanwhile I’ve become a little more active on Twitter again. I’ve been creeping down my timeline without posting for a while. The political turbulence is going into a direction that worries me because it feels like it will make me more powerless or something. The fighting offense with offense and things about culture and history being digged up and stuff are sensitive topics to me. Because my view is uncommon and people judge my descent too quick.
I had this geography teacher in middle school. Forgot her name but my friends and I used to call her “that crying face from 9GAG”. She, though there was not a single chapter in that book that had anything to do with Suriname, felt that she had to lecture her students that all Surinamese people wear fake gold, all Surinamese people get their living expenses covered by the government for free (I am not part of that dumb measure), all Surinamese people believe that they may stay home when it rains and other bullshit. A lot of Dutch people from her age (30-40) are convinced of the same nonsense, I’ve noticed. (Aside from classic all-purpose racism and fables about history (that the Dutch Golden Age was positive and slavery was fair) and sex related (big genitals and skill because of dance moves) things some people of more various ages are convinced of.) My god I’m so happy I’ve never seen her since I left school.
Meoww big yays for catching up with you. I’ve been bathrobe petting all day, though. Now I’m going to send Friday’s pictures to Alexandra (who treated me dinner on Friday, too sweeet meow now I want to treat her with something in return), take a shower and go to bed.
22:57 (10:57 PM) Capelle aan den IJssel
Featured image by Alexander Krivitskiy from Pexels.